Watch me chew this gum, watch me chew it slowly while I humiliate you in the most casual, rude way possible. I’ll blow bubbles, pop them in your face, and make you squirm while I make it obvious how little you matter to me. I own this moment, and you’re just background noise to my chewing.
You want to know what happens to the gum when I’m done with it? Tune in and find out, loser. Maybe I’ll toss it, maybe I’ll stick it somewhere you’ll regret. Either way, you’ll be begging for attention and I’ll give you exactly what I want.