You’re already a loser and tonight you’ll wear it for the holidays. I give you a full blown glittery makeover, forced to parade around all day with tacky sparkles glued to your shame, because nothing says festive like making you uncomfortable for my amusement. This is your Queen’s seasonal assignment, and you’ll enjoy every humiliating second.
Follow instructions, stay in the outfit, smile through the itch and glitter in your hair, and remember this discomfort is your punishment and your privilege. You’ll think of this humiliation every time you see tinsel, and that thought will make you come back begging for more.